Day One: It Happened. Now What.
Whether you want things to go back to the way they were or not is irrelevant right now. You must deal with what's at your feet today. Just today. This plan will carry you through it if you follow it.
The absolute rule: No stalking — not physically, not via texting, not via calling. Nothing. Give space. If someone is reaching out to you when you need quiet, send one note: "I'm not in a place where anything good would come from communicating right now. Please give me space and I'll respect yours — maybe we can talk in a few days." Then silence.
Delete the apps. Delete location services. Take charge of what you can control — and be seen doing it without saying a word.
If you work out regularly, today you do it five times harder than normal. Get exhausted. If you don't work out, today is the day cardio enters your life — it will play a huge role in early recovery. The goal is to sleep tonight, and without physical exhaustion you may not sleep at all.
Eat a really big meal. I know — you have no appetite. Choke it down. Combined with the exhausting workout and a full belly, you will sleep. Charge your phone and your earbuds.
Day Two: New Day, New Routine
Regardless of what time you wake up: get up. Immediately make your bed perfectly — even if you've never done it before. It's a new day, a new routine. Shower. Get dressed. Extra time on grooming today — make yourself as meticulously put-together as possible. If you need to call in sick to work, do it. Today is about building a routine you will stick to. That routine will carry your attention toward something other than the obvious.
Give yourself time before making calls to friends or family — it's still very new and could self-correct. If you do talk to anyone, take the high road. What you say now will be remembered.
Work out strong again — really strong. Get earbuds and listen to Ted Talks, motivational content, anything that occupies your mind. No music. Music is a grenade right now. Motivation is medicine.
Eat big again. Not McDonald's — a large salad, vegetables, fruit alongside whatever comfort food you need. I opened a box of Cocoa Puffs on Day Two of one of my hardest seasons and — because cereals come in a waxed bag — poured a half gallon of milk directly into the box. Sat on the kitchen floor with a wooden spoon. Felt like crap for two days on top of feeling like crap emotionally. Don't do that.
Charge your phone and earbuds overnight.
Day Three: Building Small Habits
By Day Three you're creating small habits. Only your discipline will ensure they become permanent. This is where you commit to controlling what you can control. Nothing else matters.
Get out of bed. Immediately get to the floor and do 20 pushups. On your knees if you have to — just do them. Make your bed perfectly, shower, make yourself as sharp-looking as possible, and get out the door.
Eat some fruit — two bananas are easy if you have them. Coffee with your earbuds in, getting motivated by distraction. If you're going to work: go, but with the premise of not sharing with anyone what's personally going on. Nobody wants to be your crying towel — and I say that with love. Nobody at your job can dedicate the time to console you. It's not fair to them, and it keeps you in the story you need to move through.
This is the time to consult with a professional or clergy if that plays a role in your life. There's no silver bullet, but these small steps give us control in what we can control — and we must take the reins now.
Go to the store. Earbuds in. Buy lots of fruits and vegetables. Yes, grab some comfort food — frozen pizza, frozen burritos, things that are easy and you'll actually eat. But remember: one-third comfort food, two-thirds healthy. This ratio matters more than you think.
Tonight: take the hottest shower you can tolerate. Let it soak over you for ten to fifteen minutes. Breathe deeply. And say this to yourself — say it out loud:
"I wish I was three months down this road, because I know I'll be so much better then."
That's your mantra now and going forward. It's true, and it will prove itself true every time you say it. The sun will look beautiful again. It's a process. Charge your phone and earbuds overnight.
Day Four: You Cannot Have What's Happening Become Who You Are
Your routines are paying off. As you run around in the morning and stop to grab something from your bedroom, you'll notice: your bed is made. The laundry is picked up. You've been wiping out the sink, polishing the faucets, wiping the mirror — all within thirty seconds of finishing your grooming. You can see a difference. As slight as it may be, it's still valuable.
Let me say something that I need you to really hear: you cannot have what's going on in your world become who you are. Life has changed. You haven't. You're dealing with it maturely and with discipline, and you should be deeply, profoundly proud of yourself.
Get to work a bit early today and going forward. Take your deep breaths when you can — in through the nose, audible exhale out the mouth. After work: get that workout in. Even thirty minutes of cardio. Keep moving. Keep the earbuds in. Motivational content only.
Eat well. Take a walk. Hot shower. Repeat your mantra. Charge everything overnight.
Day Five: Progress Recognized Yields Belief
You're seeing that routines matter now. The discipline you're applying is working in ways you can feel — not just emotionally but physically. Psychologically, this is critical: you're witnessing the results of having a plan versus spinning out of control.
Up early. Pushups — as many as possible, one set. Bed made perfectly, showered, groomed, ready for the day. Coffee, fruit, out the door. You're sore as hell, but it's a soreness you recognize as progress. You smile because you did 28 pushups today and struggled to get to 20 on Day One. Progress recognized yields belief and determination.
Your efforts must be directed toward you and you alone right now. Keep the focus internal. What you do with this time determines everything that follows.
Tonight: strip your bed and wash all your sheets and pillowcases. Make your fresh bed. Eat hearty but healthy. Hot shower. Repeat your mantra as the water soaks over you.
Day Six: Send Me an Email
The progress is notable. You can only be responsible for you and your actions. If you've been following along, you're doing wonderfully. Stay on course.
Do everything you know to get the day started. Today, send me an email at Mike@TheBestChapterYet.com — not about your pain, but about how this guide has worked for you. I will respond personally with affirmations and further direction as you close out the first week.
Before dinner: take a walk or do an hour of cardio. Earbuds providing motivational content only. No music. Tonight, eat healthy all the way — fruit, vegetables, salad. No comfort food tonight. You've earned the discipline. Charge your phone and earbuds overnight.
Day Seven: You Made It
This is the morning you wake up knowing you have just completed the hardest seven days this situation can deliver.
You stayed focused on yourself. The discipline you've demonstrated should impress you. Because here's what else happened this week: while you were following this plan, the people around you — those watching how you handle this — have been seeing something very different from what they expected.
Keep your head on straight. You're doing exactly what this plan was designed to do: preventing the spiral.
This isn't the end. Day Eight is just Day One of the rest of it. But you've proven to yourself in seven days what kind of person you're going to be through this — and that person is someone worth building a chapter on.
Stay engaged. Share your experience with other men who need to hear it. Paying it forward is part of the recovery.
Your friend,
Mike Lattuca
The Best Chapter Yet
Mike@TheBestChapterYet.com
